A couple weeks ago, a person named Kevin James Caetano, whom we lost almost 7 years ago was popping into my head almost daily at random times. It was never because one thought led to him..he'd just sort of show up. Perhaps it's because his birthday is coming up soon, but when this kind of thing happens, I usually feel like that person is trying to stop by and say hello or tell me something, but then again, I thought that only happened in dreams. Anyway, these thoughts about Kevin have been arising more and more, and recently, I woke up in the middle of the night somewhat half asleep, and I started thinking about him again, how we lost such a young, beautiful soul and of course it led me to the thought of the day we had to say good-bye, his rosary, the funeral, and how even though we lost someone we loved and it was a sad time for us, after the funeral we all had fun at his family's house sharing memories about Kevin, laughing about the good times, having water fights, because it was an extremely hot day in the middle of July, and it's what Kevin would've wanted us to do. But then I had a flash back about his mother from that day. This whole thing was like a movie playing in my head. I could see in his mother's face that losing him was like losing a big piece of her own soul. I started remembering her tears, her cries for him, her agony, and then I envisioned me telling her, "It's okay. His soul is within your heart. He's still here." I have no idea why. I didn't actually tell her that at the time, but the vision was so clear that it felt like I did. Perhaps it's what Kevin wants her to know? I'm not sure, but I always think there's a meaning behind everything, especially thoughts that come to us that are out of our control.
I got to know Kevin better during my high school years, because of his brother, going to school dances, and being involved in the Portuguese community...I remember calling him "Kevy Pooh" while he would play football just to tease him in front of his teammates, but I think he actually liked the name. :) I'll never forget during the time people would call me Mufasa because of my big hair and one time, while we were playing music in Gustine, my hair was out of control and I told him I couldn't calm my fly aways and he referenced the movie Friday and said in his best ghetto voice that he could, "You betta put some water in that daaamn shit!" It was too funny, but you probably had to be there. Those are just a couple of many memories I have of him. When I think of Kevin James, I remember him as the kindest, most sincere, trusting, protective, and humble person I had ever known. He was like a big bear, tough on the outside, but warm and fuzzy on the inside and you can't help but want to squeeze him and smile around him. His smile was so contagious, like of a child's, so big and precious, and even his bright blue eyes would smile. We all say the good ones die young and yes, it's true. People tend to get mad at God and ask why He would let that happen, but I think I understand why now. I believe it's because God takes those that have completed their good deeds and He wants his angels back. I can't imagine why else, because to me, Kevin was an angel on Earth. That's why I always have his memorial card in my car, to protect me. He never did any wrong to anyone. He always protected and defended his friends & family to the fullest. He never judged anyone. All he had was light and love in his big heart. I strongly believe Kevin James was here to be an angel on Earth, to be a good example, and God saw he did his part and took him back to be with the rest of the angels up above. It's always sad to lose the ones we really love, but what we have to remember is that they're in a better place and even though we can't see, hear, or touch them, they can still see & hear us and touch our hearts, but someday we will be with them again enjoying the good life in Heaven. Rest in peace, blue eyed angel. Cheers to your birthday coming up and for being a prime example of how a person should be. Love you, Kevin James. :)
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